Estonia has the largest number of models per capita. If that doesn’t send you looking for a flight to Tallinn, I don’t know what will. But dating Estonian women can be tricky for a foreigner.
The culture is very different from anything you have seen in the West which makes for some truly awkward situations. But you are in luck because I am here to spill all the details on what dating Estonian women is actually like.
Will that make you immune from weird and funny East meets West situations? I sure hope so, so let’s jump in.
Estonians, girls especially, are quiet and reserved people.
They don’t appreciate small talk as much as Westerners do. In fact, what you might consider friendly small talk in the U.S. and Western Europe, Estonians consider boring. Talking too much is a flaw in this culture, and silence is not awkward. This puts you in a weird situation, especially when you first start dating your Estonian girl. She doesn’t mind just hanging out without mindless babbling but you might.
To be honest, the first few dates are a bit torturous because normal signs of interest or lack thereof don’t apply. You might have spent an hour of your first outing just sipping your coffee in silence but that doesn’t mean the date was a fail or that she is cold and uninterested.
The whole dating process can feel like one big ‘Let’s get comfortable with silence’ boot camp. That being said…
Unlike most Western women, Estonian girls are not obsessed with their independence. I mean, don’t get me wrong, they are some badass chicks that do just fine on their own but they do enjoy chivalry and definitely expect you to take the lead. This includes conversations, plans, and even setting the pace of the relationship.
When you are out with your girl she will expect you to pick the place. It is seen as very bad form to show up at a date and have no idea where you two are going. Pick a nice restaurant, make a reservation, and then pick her up. No ‘We will walk around and pick one we like’, that puts her in the uncomfortable position of having to choose for you.
The same rule applies to conversations.
Dating Estonian women can become unexpectedly dull if you expect her to initiate conversation. Tell her about something funny that happened to you, ask her about her day/job/family, comment on your impressions of Estonia so far. It shouldn’t be mindless small talk but that doesn’t mean you have to spend your entire date in silence.Meet Estonian Women
Once you start dating Estonian women you will soon notice just how traditional they are.
I know in the minds of many European girls might be the synonym of sexual liberation but that is only true in the West.
Eastern European women are very conservative still. The physical part of the relationship might not come as soon as you expect it to. Waiting for at least a month (or 3 to 5 dates) before sleeping with a girl might be the last thing you want to hear but it’s usually the rule with Estonian girls.
Of course, there are exceptions to this rule like there are EVERYWHERE in the world.
Some are even saving themselves for marriage, and the number of those is larger than you might expect. Respect her decision and don’t push her. You will soon find that although they are gentle, Estonian girls stand their ground and if you insist on physical intimacy too soon you soon get branded a womanizer.
And that is not a good identifier when you are dating Estonian women.
The plus side of the traditional outlook Estonian women have on life is they are great at taking care of their men.
Girls learn to cook and care for the house from their moms. These are life skills and an Estonian not cooking well is unheard of. Traditional female roles are very much valid in Estonian society. As a guy, you would not be expected to help out in the kitchen or even do your own laundry.
You will be expected to pay for dinner and know about house repairs, though. Masculinity is also defined in a very traditional way.
That being said, you don’t have to be a misogynistic pig to be dating Estonian women.
A bit of chivalry, especially when it’s in an unexpected form, goes a long, long way. Cook for her once in a while. You can bet not a single of her ex-boyfriends has done that. Apart from those gestures, though, let her do all the cooking. You will be introduced to some seriously mouth-watering dishes. Which brings me to my next point.Meet Estonian Women
Dating Estonian women is your one-way ticket to the disgusting dad bod if you are not careful. I am talking humungous portions of hearty food like kefir (buttermilk), porridge drowned in jam (it’s how the Estonians like it), and red meats in all shapes and forms imaginable. At least the rye bread is ultra healthy, I guess.
And if you think your Estonian lady feeds you like a prince, wait till you meet her family. Estonians treat foreigner with almost exaggerated hospitality.
An Estonian dinner party will leave you so stuffed that the prospect of sex with your girl later will seem physically repulsive. I am dead serious, Estonian mothers and grandmothers are known for overfeeding their guests. You would wonder how your girlfriend manages to stay so skinny but that is genes that you don’t have. Get a gym membership the very first day or else you would be boasting a huge belly before you know it.
Another shocker when you are dating Estonian women will come as soon as you set foot in her house. The funeral photos are sure to kill your appetite. Which might be a good thing if you are trying to avoid obesity but probably not the best way to go about it. No, seriously, Estonians have funeral photos framed and hung up in their homes. Here is my daughter graduating college, here you have out vacation in Spain, and here is that time we buried auntie.
I don’t understand it, either, but I have to give you that heads up. Try not to stare at the picture for too long and just accept it as a quirk of Estonian culture.
Estonians have experienced a lot of foreign oppression throughout history. They have a proud national spirit and this is not just a figure of speech. Your Estonian girl will not appreciate any criticism of her country, people, or culture. These are truly taboo topics for Estonians (and other Baltic women) and you would do best to avoid them.
On the other hand, demonstrating an interest in the culture is a sure way to her heart. She will be more than happy to show you around, to bring you to her favourite places, and cook you some yummy traditional food, even if she barely knows you. Asking about Estonia and saying how much you love Estonian anything is one of the easiest ways to break the ice. And yes, it is also a great way to score yourself a date with that girl.
There is one topic you should avoid, though, when asking about her country and that is the recent history. The Russians did some truly horrible things to the people of Estonia. At the same time, they are still a large community in Estonia. So no matter what you have read and what opinion you express (pro or anti-Russian), there is a chance that you offend somebody. Since those are fairly recent events, people are still very sensitive about them. Steer clear of the topic altogether.
Dating Estonian women is great overall; they are beautiful, have high morals, and are not afraid to embrace their feminine side. With these precautions in mind, I am sure you will have a lot of fun.
Good luck and don’t forget to share your thoughts and experiences when it comes to Estonian girls in the comments down below.
PS: If you want to meet some Estonian girls online, make sure to sign up for this site.
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Everything You Need to Know About Estonian Culture